"I wish you wouldn't do that," the dog said disgustedly to the cat.
"Do what?" the cat yawned.
"Act like you don't care. About them. When they come home. It upsets them."
"It does not."
"It does, too! You practically turn up your nose and literally turn your back on them as soon as they come through the door." Annoyed, he shook his head until his ears flopped.
"You want me to be more like you?" the cat sneered. "Jumping up and making a God-awful racket? Tongue flying out, saliva going everywhere? Acting like you thought they'd never return? Is that how you want me to act?" She stared at the dog while delicately flexing her claws. "I wish you wouldn't do that! It's embarrassing. To me and to them."
"Nonsense." the dog snorted. "How do you think they would know I was appreciative that they had returned if I didn't react in some way. Granted it might be a little 'over the top,' but it still shows I missed them."
"Oh, please. Do you honestly think they care if we've missed them. Do you really think they even think of us when they're gone? Spare me the dramatics."
"Of course they think about us. Look at all the attention they give us when they return. Besides, we should show proper respect by letting them know, strenuously, that we're glad they're back. That we missed them!"
"Respect?? You suggest that your slobbering and acting mildly deranged shows respect?? I beg to differ. I show proper respect by acting assured. Assured that they will return. That they always will return. I show them that I have no doubts. You're the one. You act as if you thought they might abandon us." The cat's tail flicked. "I would be insulted if I were them."
"I beg your pardon, but you insult them every time you act blasé. You appear as if you could care less whether they return or not. Now that, in my opinion, is insulting!" And the dog gave another vigorous shake.
"Oh why do I even bother discussing things with you?" the cat asked distractedly. "You have no conception of respect, or dignity, or, or anything." She paused. "You remember what you drink out of, don't you?"
The dog pulled himself up to a sitting position and give a sniff. "I asked you never to speak about that again." He paused. "I'm disappointed you even brought it up."
The cat smirked as the dog turned around twice before laying back down, his head on his paws.